Friday, February 6, 2009

~♥~ I WISH WEDNESDAY ~♥~


I wish................That on Wednesday I hadn't felt like this........


And that neither had my hubby. Three days home sick with an equally sick spouse....NOT PRETTY! And if you hear a loud "THUD" ...It's me falling off my computer chair...call 911.





I wish............... That the world behaved the same way our piece of blogland behaves. Remember this beautiful Easter banner.........



Well now you have a chance to win one too. Because of Penny's generosity she is giving one away here All because she was touched by the story of Roy & Elisabeth...who are also having a great giveaway here. It's so amazing how one life in blogland touches the next, and they touch the next...and so on. We are blessed to be among so many amazing people. Please go to both places and spread your love too!




I wish...................I understood why anyone would feel the need to make this toy. YES I said TOY....Sadly the uterus has been RECALLED. Don't cry though, because the "I heart guts Co." Has plenty of lungs, livers, and bladders that you can still own. The recall notice just made me shake my head...it reads as follows: "Although the label states the uterus is not for children from 0-3 we have instituted a voluntary safety recall of the uterus,the ovaries may detach when pulled. If you gave the uterus as a gift please notify the recipient"...... SERIOUSLY???...If you gave the uterus as a gift...I'm pretty sure the recipient has already taken out a restraining order on you!




I wish............that I had listened to my mother when she tried to teach me to sew. Check out this pillow that Sally at Salmagundi made....and you HAVE to go see what she made it from!!!!! Brilliant!





I wish.....................I could teach my dogs to do this.





I wish................that if you don't follow one other link I put up here...that at least you're smart enough to click HERE and watch this short video. It is SO worth the few minutes....and it will make you LAUGH!! I just discovered Mimi's blog and I am enjoying every minute of it.




I wish...................That class and good taste were required by law..... I wonder if she'll hand the dress down to her daughter?



I wish...................that the flu wasn't such a mean witch and would quit making me wish the bathroom was 5 steps closer than it is! What do you wish???

124 comments:

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

I wish my boobs could fill out a dress like that...not that I'd wear that, but I'm just saying.

Tardevil said...

I wish that you would get well soon b/c I've missed your visits & wondered what you've been up too. At least you didn't have to go out in this miserably cold weather. Secondly, I wish that chick w/ the big honkin ta-ta's photo would be permanently removed from the internet, and that she would just go & live in the Playboy mansion. I mean really, if you're her husband, do you really want every other man in the world viewing her big boobs? Hope you & yours truly recover quickly! ;O)

Jan said...

That dress overtakes the whole post. What was she thinking? Funny as usual.

Anonymous said...

I wish I knew who made that awful wedding dress... I'd send THEM a restraining order... sheesh! Is nothing sacred anymore, not even a wedding?

Di
The Blue Ridge Gal

Happy To Be/ Gl♥ria said...

I wish for you to get better girl you and the hubby..and WOW!! was that not a sleazy bride or what..I afraid if my daughters wanted dresses like that when they got married they would have paid for the wedding them selfs,,,hugs and smiles Gl♥ria

Beth at Aunties said...

Nikki,
I am so sorry you both are so sick. Truly!
I hope you can get some quality cuddle time during this time AND get paid for it!!! You know sick leave:) That just might be the bright side.:-) The only bright side.
Hope the FLU FLIES away soon! YUCK!
Oh the Jazz really blew them out of the water last night. I hope that brought you a little joy:)
♥hugs♥

Southern Lady said...

Nikki, I've missed you and I'm so sorry to hear you and Steve have been sick. I hope this finds you both feeling much better.

Get some rest this weekend ...

Sincerely,

Janie

Nana said...

I wish I had that dress baby!!
Hope you feel better soon!!!!!!!!

Nana said...

I wish I had that dress baby!!
Hope you feel better soon!!!!!!!!

French Fancy... said...

how weird designing a toy fallopian tube and uterus. Really strange.

Hope you both feel better soon

x

Unknown said...

I wish you'd get better..

Nana said...

Wow I must want the dress bad to end up w/ 2 comments about it.

Darlene said...

I wish that you and hubby will get well quickly! Hope you have a better weekend!

Lynette said...

I wish you and hubs would get better soon - I've missed you out here!!

I just know that whoever the sicko that made the uterus toy could NOT have been a woman - are you kidding me!!

Feel better soon!

Anonymous said...

I wish you lived next door to me so I could make you some chicken soup to help you feel better. That bride gives weddings a bad name, doesn't she? I hope you and hubby get to feeling better soon.

Hugs,
Chris

Tristan said...

That "wedding" dress...EWWWWWWW!

Feel better!

Kristen said...

I wish I didn't just watch that spider video!!!
:0 Spiders give me the willies...but I had to see it to the end to find out what was so funny...yuck!

Hope you guys feel better soon!

Penny said...

I wish, that I had, just a portion of what she has hanging out of that dress!
Just say NO to the uterus, toy!
I wish that I had a pooper scooping, dog too..
I am on my own with poop patrol!
Feel better, soon!

Nancy Rosalina said...

I wish I had half of what she has hanging out of that(dress?)
I wish you were feeling better! Hope it doesn't last long for you all! Blessings, Nancy

Debra Hall said...

I wish I could write like you do which makes people like me LOL!! Feel better Miss Nikkicrumpet and hubby too ...Debra

Salmagundi said...

Oh!! Nikki - I'm so sorry you and yours are sick with the crud. Let's hope it disappears quickly and you are back to normal. I hope that the bride paid for the dress herself, and that her parents didn't foot the bill. If her parents paid - then that's two generations gone looney. Thanks for the link to my blog. You know it is never too late to learn to sew. Take care, rest up and have a great weekend. Sally

The Kooky Queen--Rachel said...

You are *TOO* much!!! I just found your blog and I can't stop laughing!!!!!!!!!!!! SO FFFFFFunny!!

Bridget said...

Our poor Nikki is a sickie! I hope things are starting to look up a little bit! Remember the BRAT diet, bananas, rice, apple sauce and toast.

Anonymous said...

I can't wish for anything right now. I'm still in awe of the boobs...not really a good awe either. I can't imagine bra shopping, but I think those are designed not to need bras. They seem as though they just stay high...well, as high as you can get with those whoppers.

-FringeGirl

Unknown said...

Sorry to hear you weren't feeling well! I wish you a happy and healthy weekend!

Shell in your Pocket said...

Oh my goodness..that dress has to be joke..she will look back at that!
-sandy toe
p.s. I love thos bunnies with the ribbon!

Ginger said...

Hi Nikki:
Sure hope you and your hubby start feeling better soon.
That Easter banner is adorable. I will go check out the blog...
I wish my dog would clean up after himself too.
Ginger

Kristin said...

I wish that I hadn't seen that wedding dress picutre. Are these people for real?

Anonymous said...

LOL I wish I had enough to put in that dress LOL :) awesome post!

Bo said...

Awww Nikki...I hope you conquer the crud SOON! You know, I was thinking the bride may be wearing more clothes than usual, because she's probably a stripper or prostitute...but what was that company thinking when they came up with a toy uterus...gag! Sending you & Steve well wishes! ♥ Bo

Shauna said...

I am sorry you have been sick! Hope you get feeling better soon! L♥ve and Hugs :)

Linda - Behind My Red Door said...

I wish you hadn't shown us that picture of the boob with the boobs! Now I am wishing my bathroom was closer since I am about to barf...

Anonymous said...

Hi Nikki! Somehow that dress made me WANT TO THROW DARTS!!lol Anyway I am sooo sorry you and hubby are sick (especially together; nothing romantic about that!!!) Feel better SOON! I can't even comment about the uterus thingy?? but I will say the recall cracked me up! Stay warm - Sincerely, Jeannette

Kat said...

I wish that you felt better! Came home from work yesterday and DH was home sick, now I've got the crud! I wish I hadn't seen that dress. I wish I had thought of Sincerely Yours dart comment first! And I wish I hadn't watched the spider video, it made me laugh so hard my head hurts more. Thanks for the laughs, get better soon. Kathy

Anonymous said...

Another hilarious post Nikki! That dress...I don't think I could add anything to what has already been said.

LMBO!

You've been missed! I hope you and the hubster get better soon!

We need Nikki back in full swing!

LOL

www.AForestFrolic.typepad.com said...

Oh Nikki, I sure hope you and your hubs are feeling better. I swear, that flu bug is biting everyone in it's path. And OMG, that girl has lost her mind!! Wish my dog would do that too, he used to poop on the sidewalk on walks and it was so gross because he had bowel problems for the longest time, hahahaha. And ya know...I was just thinking that the other day. If the world was a nice as the bloggy community, it would be a better place. Wonder why that is?
Jamie

niartist said...

Eeek, hope you're feeling better - and someone should have slapped the girl in the wedding dress - what the h&ll was she thinking!

Raven said...

I am going to go out on a limb here and say that while the upper portion of that dress is agreeably slut-rific, it isnt the biggest problem! The biggest problem is that the dress is WHITE! Anyone who would wear something like that on their WEDDING DAY (and again this is just an assumption) probably doesnt deserve the color of purity!

wendy said...

I feel ya, I was home from work two days this week with the puk-a-rhea. NO FUN. (sorry) Those wishes were funny. Where can I get that dress(J/K) And seriously, I don't know how people are able to make all the beautiful things they do. Amazing stuff.
hope you get better soon, your husband probably won't as men seem to "linger/suffer" with their illnesses so much longer then we women...correct?

Michelle said...

That bridal gown has left me speechless.

I hope you are feeling better. I hate being sick! Hugs!

Dawn said...

I wish you weren't sick!

I wish people's personalities didn't change when they are behind the wheel of a car. It is amazing to me!

These were great. I just love your I Wish Wednesdays! :)

Anonymous said...

I wish for you and your hubby to feel better Nikki !!!

All the best,
Kathy :)

Anonymous said...

ps even when you're sick you're funny LOL

Anonymous said...

ooppps that was me

Kathy :)

Bridget said...

Hey if you stop throwing up or whatever unmentionable things you are doing and I'd love to have you along. I hear tell it is likely to snow there next week. I guess you are used to that sort of thing though. I was hoping for sun. It is raining up a storm here but we need it desperately.

Laura Marchant said...

Oh that wedding dress! I have seen that before, Gross!

Jane In The Jungle said...

Hmmm.... wonder if she bought those ta-ta's for the prom also! No wonder that dude is smiling and standing up so straight and proud, LOL!!
Hope you start feeling better really soon!!

Erin said...

That dress...are you KIDDING me??? Gross!

I'm sorry you are not feeling well. I really hope things start looking up soon!

Lisa Loo said...

I want to know what the point of the necklace was?! I mean, seriously---

The uterus recall--well--I thought you were joking. But I clicked on the link and BAM---it was for real. What I want to know--is --why put a face on it--who chose the face? It looks like kind of an embarrassed face-like--"heh-heh--I'm as uncomfortable as you about this..."

And thanx for the link about Roy--you are so good at finding all this stuff--I will add him to my prayers.

jill jill bo bill said...

I wish you weren't sick.

I love that bridal pix!!! I used that picture in a post earlier and the invitation that went with it is even funnier.

Renna said...

I wish you felt better, and I wish I didn't have the image of that girl's chi chi's now burned into my brain! I'm still shaking my head over that.

Phyllis said...

Hey Nikki,

I'm sorry you and hubby are feeling poopie! The poor pooches must miss you too!

tammy said...

Why even cover your nipples at that point? Oh, maybe it's helping them stay in place instead of bouncing down the aisle?

So sorry you're sick. Hope I didn't catch it while visiting your blog. Better go wash my hands now.

Bargain Decorating with Laurie said...

My first wish is that you and your husband start feeling a whole lot better! If you are able to train your doggies to pick up their poop, I wish you'd tell me how you do it. I wish I'd never seen that bride! laurie

Anonymous said...

I hope you are feeling better:) That is the ugliest dress I have ever seen!! Where do you find this stuff??? And where is that girls mother??!!

Fragrant Liar said...

I wish that chick's mother had slapped her upside the head and made her go back inside and put on something decent. That's disgusting. I always say, Just because you can doesn't mean you should.

So there.

Anonymous said...

Oh, Nikkiness! Poor thing and hubby too! I hope you get well soon! But one thing I can tell the flu didn't hamper your wit! Now that boob wedding dress is something else!
Be a sweetie and get well soon,

Shelia ;)

imjacobsmom said...

My wish is that you guys will get over your crud and get back on your feet soon. Thanks for taking the time to still give us all a good laugh. Hang in there! ~ Robyn

Danyelle Ferguson said...

Oh my! What a horrendous wedding dress! I truly hope you're feeling better. BTW - I tagged you over on my wedding blog.

Kathy said...

I wish you both better Nikki, I also wish that bride would put both of those away, seriously haha. a toy uterus WHY!!. although I would love to see the look on my friends face if I was to give her one of those heehee. I wish I had more time today to visit your friends, the pillow and the Easter banner are beautiful, I will book mark them and return. are you sure OZ and Crumpet can't already sweep up their own doings. wishing you both a speedy recovery, hugs, Kathy.

Swirl Girl said...

I wish I had done better hiding of my wedding photo

hope you feel better!

Anonymous said...

How'd you find my prom picture...my date said she was going to be flashy, but I had no idea. Sorry to hear you haven't been feeling well...feel better.

bj said...

oH, so sorry you and hubby are sick. It seems this stuff is EVERYWHERE! All my family have it but me...and I snarl at 'em if they come too close....
Get well really soon...
extra hugs, bj

Michael said...

LOL, well if that just didn't reaffirm the whole gay thing...

Kris said...

I wish the "I Love Guts Co" would recall the brides boobs. I'm sure they pose a danger to ages 0-99.

I also wish you and your hubby are better soon.

Kris

Anonymous said...

I hope you feel better soon! ((Hugs))

P.S. I can't believe that dress!

Anonymous said...

Aw, hope you're feeling better soon!


That dress....too much!


I seriously want that uterus toy....hahahahahaha!

Anonymous said...

I know, I wish I knew how to sew too.

Jessica said...

I wish you felt better. :) My Mister ( who is finally off on a weekend w/me ) came home sick today. ggggrrrrrrr. :(

That dress is something else...lol.

Hugs~ J

Tracey said...

I too wish that you and hubby get well soon!!!
Tracey

onlymehere said...

Oh my gosh, that wedding dress and uterus are obscene! Who in the world would dare wear that dress or give that as a gift? I guess it truly takes all kinds to make this world go round. Hope you're feeling better!

Sue said...

If my boobs were that big on the day I got married I'm sure I could have found a better catch then i did.....

Neabear said...

I wonder if anyone was still standing at the wedding. Well, the pictures shows a couple. I would think people would have keeled over from the shock after seeing that dress!

mCat said...

I wish you to get better soon!
Sick = sucks!

roy/elisabeth dean said...

I wish I had "met" people like you,Penny, Mary, Ann, Shelle, Lori, Monica and so many others long ago! You make me laugh so much~ and I have REALLY needed to laugh!

I'm sorry you have been so sick! I'm terrified of flu!

The uterus toy!!! Brings back such fond memories of MY long-lost uterus...as does the re-make of my wedding dress~

Take care, ♥ U, Lilly

Nana said...

I wish I could run you over some cookies!!!!!!!!

santamaker said...

Good Grief Girl ! Sure hope Crumpie and Ozzie are takin' good care of "yous" (that's how they say it up there, right?)... I had put "y'all" but decided I better change it.
I bet that bride made her Momma proud! Yikes, did they allow her in the church, looking like that? You can't buy good taste, I guess.

Jill said...

That man steps on his brides dress it's all boobies from here!

ko said...

i wish you would feel better SOON! :) And your sweet hubby! :) I also wish I had BOOBIES like that! WOW! That girls needs the WOODEN SPOON bad!!!!!!!! Love you sweet friend! :) I really do hope you feel better soon@ :)
kyley

Midlife, menopause, mistakes and random stuff... said...

Your BLOG is a riot....now I HAVE to follow....

Wait, that doesn't sound right - -me a follower, lol??

Stop by and see me for a minute on Midlife if you have as extra 5 seconds that you are bored.

Great BLOG. Love it!

♥ Braja said...

Now, Nikki my lovely, that girl is just being SENSIBLE with her wedding gown, ensuring that she can't fall out of it later when she's drunk.

And is Crumpet doing calendar poses?????

Anonymous said...

You poor baby.I have a lite case of the flu.I had a flu shot and RAN to the dr.I hope you had lots of help.
Loved your blog as usual.Yes,Isn't Penny just the prettiest,most talented little thing/And Sally and that pillow.Shezam.....And the spiders on drugs?Where or who thought up that?
Always funny,always you.Now----get well...Ann

A Southern Rose said...

I 'wish' that you and your hubby would get well! I'm sick in the bed too. I think that I have a bad kidney infection. I 'wish' that I would have cut down on coke like I said that I would for my New Year's resolution.
Take care and get well,
Lee Laurie

SmilingSally said...

That "bride" HAS to be a porn star!

I admired Sally's (nice name!) pillow when I first saw it too.

I sure hope that you and your husband are doing A-ok now.

Rue said...

Hi Nikki :)

How do you keep finding pictures of me?? ;)

I wish someone would make all these boxes dissapear, so I could start decorating :)

Congratulations on your 100th post. I'm sorry I missed it, but I did enjoy the wheel videos LOL

hugs,
rue

Happy To Be/ Gl♥ria said...

GM Nikki...thanks for coming by girl and for your prays for Kyra..your the best...hugs and smiles Gl♥ria

onlymehere said...

Just stopping by with a hot bowl of chicken soup. Hope it makes you feel better.

Justine said...

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I wish you felt better, that's what I wish!

I also wish you hadn't posted that titty bride photo. I think it may have seared my retinas.

Justine :o )

Mammatalk said...

I wish the flu didn't exist!

cedwards55 said...

Wishing that today finds you feeling better! At least you have the most beautiful bedroom in the world to recover in!
The girl in the boob wedding dress? What the heck was she thinking?

THE DAILY GRIPE said...

Love your blog!! Wow, that was some wedding dress. Hilarious!

Anonymous said...

Hi Nickki, I'm sorry you and the hubby aren't feeling well. I hope you are better soon.
Well thank goodness that uterus has been recalled. That dress is a hoot! I guess she wanted to make sure she was noticed. LOL

Dennis and Leslie said...

I'm so sorry you're sick, hope you're feeling better soon!

Fifi Flowers said...

OMG... you left the best photo for last... WOW is all I can say!

If you manage to train your dogs to scoop... please send me the training manual!

That spider video is CLASSIC... I need to email it to a few friends!

I hope you feel better!
Fifi

Free Art Printables said...

I hope you are feeling better soon! The pictures are great!

Donna said...

Hi, Nikki,
I just found your blog the other night, and it was so funny and entertaining that I went back to your very first blog and read ALL of it! Your dogs are so cute and hilarious. (It's hard to believe they are not really saying those things. LOL)
Question: I went to the "Gollum" blog, but could not find how to do the picture to look like a drawing.
Can you please show me where it is?
Donna

The Painted Garden said...

LOL - If making us laugh could make you and your hubby feel better faster - then you would be feeling great by now.. . because . . . your blog posts are so fabulous - fun and funny to read. They say laughter IS the best medicine!
Hope you and yours are feeling better.
Blessings,
Erin and Bentley

John Deere Mom said...

Hope you're better soon! But those pictures were hilarious! And that dress!!! Ack!

Anonymous said...

I hope you're feeling so, so much better.

OMG, would you look at those ta-ta's. What was she thinking? Well, I guess knowing what she was thinking might scare us even more. :-0

tiburon said...

I wish that you weren't sick.

I wish that I wasn't sick.

I wish that my family wasn't sick!

Carolynn Anctil said...

I'm sorry to hear you've caught the awful flu bug...most of my colleagues have it too...it sure gets around.

That bride must come from the school of "If you've got it, flaunt it." If I was hubby, I'd be a Runaway Groom. How embarrassing. You can bet no one will be looking at her ring.

CJ, The Purple Diva said...

I wish that stupid people wouldn't do stupid things; ie...the dress and that toy! What the heck?
And I wish I could hire a dog trainer to teach your dogs for you!
And I wish you weren't sick or your DH at the same time.
And I wish I was there so I could hug your funny little neck!

bernthis said...

Love the dog cleaning up after himself. If I could find one of those, I'd adopt him in a heartbeat. Hell, I don't think I could find a man to do that.

the voice of melody said...

I hope you and your hubby feel better very soon. I'm going to make chicken soup in a little bit, too bad we don't live anywhere close or I'd make a special delivery for the two of you!

xinex said...

I am so sorry you and your hubby are both not feeling good and I wish you would!...Christine

nikkicrumpet said...

Hey Donna: I'm not sure how to get in contact with you because I can't see an email or a blog. But I'll but the instructions here in case you come back. It's super easy and it's free. just go to photobucket.com and down load your pictures. Then hit the "edit" button....then find the button on top that says "effects" scroll through until you find the tab for "fresco" click the button and TADA! Super simple and a really pretty effect. If you have any trouble just let me know. And thanks for reading all the posts...that must have taken a very long time!

Anonymous said...

There are just no words for that wedding dress. None. Zero. Nada. Zilch.

I'm dumbfounded.

Hope you and the hubs are feeling better soon!

Anonymous said...

Here's what I'm wondering: didn't that woman have any friends that would have told her that she looked like a total f'ing hooker??

Nana said...

You are too nice! Still wish I could run over and give you a Sugar Cookie. ( they are all gone anyway)

Hope you are feeling better.

Oh, I found that dress at Bridal Barn and wore it to church today.

No one seemed to notice, maybe because by boobs look like deflated basketballs.

Jenners said...

Hope you are all feeling better soon! Seems like everyone is getting sick lately!

The dog cleaning his poop is just too classic! And LORDY ... what was she thinking with that dress????? Seriously, could NO ONE say anything to her?

raccoonlover1963/Lisa Myers said...

Hi Nikki. I wish you and your hubby will get better soon. I wish that engineers could come up with a substance to mix with concrete and asphalt so that ice and snow would NEVER stick to the roads. I think I figured out how miss thing is keeping the dress up... she looks like the type that would have her nipples pierced, then put pins through and fasten to the so-called dress! Okay, I know that's totally disgusting, but I've been up since 4:00 this morning and I'm exhausted!!!!! I think up weird things when I'm tired.
Take care, get better and have a great week.
Lisa

tam said...

I wish you and your hubby would get better quick! And I wish I had skinny thighs and a smaller nose!LoL!
~Tam :D

Shannon said...

Just when I thought I've seen it all...

Along comes a plush uterus.


Awesome.




(Hope you guys are feeling better!)

Ash said...

That chick has got some nerve to wear white.

I guess a veil would have been to hypocritical - or cover up the boobs.

I weep.

I hope you're feeling better today!!!

Off to watch the funny video... Em

Ash said...

Thank you!!

P.S. the ovary plush begs the question, did the "franks and beans" version get recalled because of the beans tendency to be pulled off as well? Yes, that is the only question that popped into my head when I saw that, why do you ask?

Marrdy said...

I am so sorry you have been sick. and with that nasty flu!

But I am now distrubed and have to take a nap after seeing that bride. Her mother must be proud!

Shannon said...

I'm sorry you're not feeling. Chicken soup for you!
I would pay good money if someone could train my dog to do that!!

Bo said...

Hi Nikki-girl...I'm back to check on you & see if you are feeling better (Steve too)...BTW, I hope I didn't upset you over the skunk joke I sent you via email...I got such a giggle from it, I decided to send it to you hoping it would make you laugh & feel some better too...forgive me please if it didn't work out that way...♥ Bo

Grand Pooba said...

Yikes! I totally just lost my train of thought after that last picture.

You were saying?

Stacy Uncorked said...

I wish I had seen this post on Friday so I wouldn't be late to the party in the comments section... ;)

Now I think I really have seen it all... thanks! ;)

Anonymous said...

I hope you're feeling better. Some of those pics are too much!

Pearce Fam said...

My first thought when I saw the wedding dress was to say "Chris get over here you have to see this hideous dress." But then I thought better of it. She might pop out of that pic at any moment!

Kathi~Lavender, Lace and Thyme said...

Nikki, I hope you are feeling better! I stopped by and read part of your post when I was ill but couldn't sit upright long enough to finish! LOL

Boobs and ovaries...hmmmm, sounds like a man's world! LOL

I appreciated your visit while I was ill, you are special!

Hugs,
Kathi :)

Jannie Funster said...

Someone HAD to have photoshopped that dress, dontcha think?

The poop scooping pooch tho, I believe to be an actual unretouched photo.

 

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