Wednesday, May 27, 2009

~♥~ I WISH WEDNESDAY ~♥~


I wish.................................That total dorks ruled the world. We'd be so much more amused.











I wish...................................The "pro choice" groups didn't also make street signs. They're just not nice people.









I wish/hope......................my hubby doesn't see this product....because Ozzie might be in some trouble.










I wish................that all of you people who buy plush stuffed poop for your kids......



would start thinking outside the box....there is a WHOLE NEW WORLD in stuffed toys out there..............







I wish.....................newspapers hired better proof readers...but hey this would be a great product!!!









I wish.....................to post this as proof of why I get lost driving in New England.....See.... It's not my fault!!









I wish...........................someone could explain the concept of "LOGIC" to the highway department.










I wish.............................That you will take a second and go to "Inside Aileigh's Heart" and read about her "SPARKLING BOOBIES"...it will make you giggle.











I wish............................never to have a toilet clog so bad that I am desperate enough to try this. Lets say it all together now..........."EWWWWWWWWW"











I wish......................That I wasn't afraid of kids today.....gee anyone else think that alcohol and guns might be the wrong message to send about PROM!









I wish............................Sporting events had a "dress code"











I wish.............................to own one of these....and to be able to wear it to work!!!!







I wish...................My hubby was more "hip" when it came to keeping up with the latest trends....heck it would be great to borrow from HIS closet!












I wish.........................To point out that making Fake I.D. is not for everyone. And to Inform Mr. Jose Pacheco that Mensa won't be calling him any time soon.









I wish.......................This didn't scare the BEJEEBIES out of me. I'm gonna have to sleep with the light on.




I also wish to pat myself on the back for actually getting this done on Wednesday...sometimes I amaze myself. And here's to hoping that all your wishes come true...and you don't have to go into the basement to find them!

93 comments:

Jannie Funster said...

The drivers license kills me!

lol, x 100.

Kristina P. said...

Well, I'm topless in my DL picture, so all is right with the world again.

Beverly said...

That first picture is my favorite. I don't know why, but it just makes me laugh.

We've got plenty of people around where I work that play stupid, too.

Midwest Mommy said...

Oh that fake id...how dumb can you be, lol

Jan the crazy lady said...

So funny. That fake id just cracked me up. And the sporting wear, that is disturbing.

Have a great day in the sun today :)

Grand Pooba said...

You are truly an amazazing person. So amazing that in fact I would totally go down the stairs first.

Why does that plush poop look so comfy?

KC Mom said...

Good job getting it done on wednesday!! I'm thinking I better not ever be a proof reader...I'm sure I've made similar mistakes!

shortmama said...

Freakin hilarious!

Lee Laurie said...

You go girl! You got it done on Wednesday! Well...I got my daily laughs in before I have to go into work where most of them 'like to play stupid!' I wish that I had that button!

Ann said...

My husband works with Driver's Licenses...I had to forward that to him!

At least it wasn't our state!

Thanks for the mid-week pick-me-up!

Ally said...

I know my boys would just love to play with herpes and sperm, what kid wouldnt? j/k...thats just crazy.

Melissa said...

Oh how I want that playing stupid button. I would totally wear it to work EVERY DAY!

DiPaola Momma said...

I wish Russians knew what a plunger was. I wish that Super Mario Brother there weren't related to my Italian in-laws. I wish I hadn't take that picture with Jose. I wish I wasn't drinking Diet Dr Pepper when I started reading this post (when will I learn?!)

Mom in High Heels said...

I wish...I had never seen that toilet picture and that we were friends IRL, cause you crack me up.

Quirkyloon said...

Oh my gawsh!

I am so gonna go through my five-year-old's underwear drawer right now!

All superman undies are OUT.OF.HERE!!!

Thanks for the laughs Nikki!

Diane @ Four Paws and Co said...

Good ones Nikki! I did a double take on the fake id - yikes! ☺ Diane

Beth at Aunties said...

..."EWWWWWWWWW"!!! I so agree.
I laughed at the signs...the dorks already run things!
I also loved the sperm pillow...It's shape has always reminded me of the fireworks which go spread out in the sky and then crackle...I would love one for our bed! :-) LOL

Barb said...

you crack me up.... the button is one of the reasons I don't work :)

Pedaling said...

can't wait to read about the sparkly boobies!

Lisa said...

I've been checking out your blog for a few weeks and just wanted to say hi. I love your "I wish wednesdays" posts, they always crack me up. Thanks for the laughs!

Joanna Jenkins said...

The sporting events clothing cracked me up. I might even know that guy :-) Great post. Thank you!

The Blue Ridge Gal said...

You know, basements STILL give me the creeps, and ours is well-lit. Still, you just never know what's lurking behind the closed doors down there. YIKES!!

Di
The Blue Ridge Gal

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

Holy moly you found some doozies...again! :) That fake ID one is a major D'OH! moment... ;)

Thanks for the endless laughs! :)

Simply Donna...... said...

I always look forward to Wednesday (or Thursday) to see your "I wish" pictures. They are so funny, it makes my day. Thanks!

H.K. said...

I just want to know what sporting event the guy in speedo is in because I SOOO want to watch and have a great laugh! You have to admit it would be entertaining!

Suzi said...

Entertaining as always. I just wish some people weren't so stupid! But maybe stupid people are a good thing, we can weed them out to find the ones worth while.

Not The Rockefellers said...

Fun! and that Off product should have been labeled EFF OFF!

Also that was one super jock.

Sheesh.

I'll take the basement over that anyday.

Peace - Rene

Erin said...

The dress code at the sporting events just slays me. Who would stand like that?!?

mbkatc230 said...

Thanks for the giggles my friend. The driver's license is hysterical. But what on earth were they thinking when they let the prom kids pose like that? Apparently those photographers won't be joining Mensa anytime soon either! Kathy

Heather @ Sugar N Spice Mostly Nice said...

I wish I could narrow one down to comment on, but I was loling the entire time I read the post. My 5 year old asked me to hush!

Justine said...

Ah, I really miss basements!

OMG, i so want that sperm plush toy!!! I want it I want it I want it!!!!!!

Justine :o )

Sara's Sweet Surprise said...

The ironic thing...the Spanish translation for Mensa is,foolish or stupid. Hmmm, go figure life is "fool" of surprises.

Someday my wish Wednesday will be to be added to your blog roll...before menopause completely takes over and I forget what a blog roll is altogether.

Sweet wishes,
sara

carma said...

Aileigh's sparkly boobie post was a classic. Awesome to see her featured...

Incest Repellent- as Martha would say: "It's a Good Thing."

Who knew fake poop items were so marketable!! There is a quite a plethora of poop items available for purchase...

Sandy Toes said...

Those stuff animals are CRAZY!!!
sandy toe

Darlene said...

Oh, I definitely like the button!!!! I would wear it proudly...lol

Laura said...

Great ones, as usual!

dana said...

Come onnnnnn. You call THAT a BASEMENT? I'm not bragging, but my CELLAR can out freak that basement any day....I mean NIGHT.

Bobbi Jo said...

Your amazing another great post. And I am NO WAY going down there. EEEEK! I am a chicken.
Hugs, Bobbi Jo

John Deere Mom said...

That's my kind of menswear!!

Swirl Girl said...

love the fake id doofus!! at first I thought he spelled Mississippi wrong...but then I realized the date!! LOL!

ps- your daughter is scary hot! If she were mine, I'da locked her up long ago....

Jessica GaleforceOne said...

I don't get the driver's licesence one...but I do enjoy the basement picture and just for your information I would push someone down the stairs before I went down there if I say a creapy pair of eyes down at the bottom..talk about my worst nightmare!! Its not the dark I am afraid of its WHAT'S in the dark I am afraid of!

Mama said...

Ewwwwwwwwww is right and yikes to superman at the sports event (well supersomething anyway hehe) omgosh to those stuffed toys, I think I would take my chances in the basement over any of these others, off to check out the sparkling boobies post, Happy Wednesday. Kathy.

Jessica said...

Yikes~ the basement....we don't have them here so they really creep me out. Ewwww & the dress code thing~ the superman unders GA-ROSS!

:) J

imjacobsmom said...

It has been confirmed - I am a total dork! I actually have a pair of those great glasses AND I think they are FUN! (I actually got quite good at them, too.) ~ Robyn

imjacobsmom said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Tracey said...

Thanks for another wednesday of laughs :)
Tracey

Becky said...

Yay! Your the best! You got my Wednesday highlight done:) Thank you!

That is called a snake {{ugh}} and unfortunetly we own one (although I have never touched it or used it!!) In a house with these 3 boys our toliet is clogged more than I would like to admit! ewww...

(I never knew about these things until I had boys..ugh!)

I love that button. I think I must have it!

onlymehere said...

What a genius with the driver's license!! The two bright dots in the basement scare the heck out of me...what's down there? Is it bigger than me? Oh the possibilities are terrifying! A girl who suffers from nightmares should never have seen this (me). I'll tell my husband to blame you when he wakes up tonight with me screaming and beating him to a pulp! LOL!

kathy said...

I love blogs that make me laugh and you are on top lady. I'm sorry I've been absent, I left a post on my blog explaining everything.

Jadehollow said...

Ms Nikki.. Thank you for stopping by earlier and for becoming a follower.. I'm so honored!! Oh My Gosh! I've been following you for quite some time now and I just love your humor.. You are a riot! I also love getting to know all of your lil blogger spotlights.. like today's pick.. Aileigh and her "Sparkling Boobies" oh my side that was so a me moment.
As for the Kudzu.. Feel free to come and take all you want lol. All you need to get started is a piece the size of a quarter.. and it takes over like wildfire! You can't kill it!
Again thanks for dropping by..
Hugs,
Debbie

Marrdy said...

Plush poop...pretty funny. So are the other plushes! You couldn't pay me $1,000,000 to go down a dark scary basement. That's where the monster live you know!

Linda's Blue Gate said...

I am NOT going down there....... even if my wishes are down there...... spookie...
HUgs
Linda

Cadance said...

the Prom Pic...??? That is phyco!

.....I've heard of the "snake" for the toilet...but I DO NOT think you are sapossed to put your mouth anywhere...SICK!!!!!

the DL cracked me up! Have you watched the movie Super-Bad...they have scene with a fake ID in there with the name McLovin I crack up at that scene every-time!! NO first name just McLovin...the cop looks at it and says....(after a long pause) OH..so I see you're an Organ Donor! hehehe..that gets me everytime!

Suzann @ Lavender and Roses said...

LOL. I love your Wednesdays.

That sperm is cute - ya gotta admit.

Ginger said...

I love that dork picture. It's so dorky, it's funny. Yep, I am saying Ewww to the toilet plunger.
And keep that "pet spray" away from my fur buddies. Great shoes in the menswear section. lol
Funny, funny post.
How are Oz and Crumpet doing? Haven't seen them for awhile.

laurie @ bargain hunting said...

Congratulations on your Wed. post on Wed! OMG! Do people really do that with their toilets? Now that's scary! laurie

Susie Q said...

You ma'am are still number one at this funny game. I now make sure I have swallowed whatever I am drinking before I read your silliness. Thank youf or all the joy!

Love,
Sue

Emma said...

well done! Hi I came over from my moms blog "no botox allawed"

Rainy Day Farm said...

That stuffed poop was hilarious. My son would love that, and probably take to church with him! It's all about the poop at 6!

Shawn said...

I'm still gagging over the toilet picture---acckkkk!

Bo said...

Hiya Nikki...Thanks for the giggles this very early morning!
You've given me something to dream about if I can actually go back to sleep now...LOL ;-) Bo

Lynn from For Love or Funny said...

GREAT post! Too funny.

My husband and I might have to get the toilet contraption.

thedomesticfringe said...

So funny once again. I loved it. I just hope my husband never buys a pair of those shoes, unless of course they are in my size.

-FringeGirl

Joyce said...

I need to order lots of those stupid buttons:)
Joyce

tiburon said...

I LOVE your Wednesday lists. They make my whole day!

Momma@Live. Laugh. Pull your hair out said...

Another brilliant post! Love it!

ko said...

2 funny........i almost puked though with the clogged toilet thing!!!! GROSS!

LOVE YA

LadyFi said...

So funny! Some of those road signs are hilarious - while still defying all logic!

roy/elisabeth dean said...

I'm holding out for a gonorrhea plush toy! Surely it will be next!

Loved the Mississippi Drivers License. I had to look twice to make sure it didn't come out of a redneck county here in Alabama (same caliber of people)!

I hate basements too!

BTW...how did Lacey do?

Make it a great day~
♥,Lilly

Jenners said...

I always look forward to these posts. They are just so damn funny. Thank you for them!!! And I'm contemplating the purchase of the stuffed sperm ... it is just too cute!

Anne Alagna said...

Am I the only one who thinks that guy stuffed his superman undies? I think he used the herpes toy.

wendy said...

YEAh, I'm not going in that basement. And tell me what sporting event that was so I an make suer I DON'T GO THERE. I think that guy has been stealing the hot dogs (HA HA HA)

Lilly said...

The road signs always get me - as for the superman who forgot his clothes - ewwww, put it away.

lilsista said...

Who knew Herpes could be so cute? Sending you infinite smiles cause you really make me laugh! I'm new to blog land but I think you're my favorite so far!!! Please don't tell Tootsie...She doesn't really count anyhow cause I have to like her...she's family :) !
Lilsista

Tootsie said...

love it!!! hope you got all your planting done!!! I did!! now I am doing other insane stuff to my garden...will share next week! link up to flaunt your flowers if you like!!!!

Jill said...

Great post as always... LOL!

Scrappy Girl said...

Loved all these...glad I found your blog while bloggy surfing. I totally need to get those stuffed animals for Dr. Hubby's office...LOL!

Gaston Studio said...

Those highway signs are to die for they're so funny!

Left you something at my place; please come by to pick up.
Jane

Anonymous said...

Thought you'd like this Nikki :

TO MY SISTAHS… (I got a real kick out of these 15 thoughts for today!)

Aspire to be Barbie - the bitch has everything.

If the shoe fits - buy them in every color.

Take life with a pinch of salt... A wedge of lime and a shot of tequila.

In need of a support group? - Cocktail hour with the girls!

Go on the 30 day diet. (I'm on it and so far I've lost 15 days).

When life gets you down - just put on your big girl panties and deal with it.

Let your greatest fear be that there is no PMS and this is just your personality.

I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

Lead me not into temptation, I can find it myself.

Don't get your knickers in a knot; it solves nothing and makes you walk funny.

When life gives you lemons in 2009 - turn it into lemonade then mix it with vodka.

Remember wherever there is a good looking, sweet, single or married man there is some woman tired of his bullshit!

Keep your chin up, only the first 40 years of parenthood are the hardest.

If it has tires or testicles it's gonna give you trouble.

By the time a women realizes her mother was right, she has a daughter who thinks she's wrong.

Kathy :)

wenderful said...

We had a basement just like that growing up.

Lizzie said...

super funny! Oh and i went by and voted for your baby girl, she's in 3rd place so far!

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

I nearly had a heart attack on that last one. You ought not to post things THAT funny where an old lady can get at them! And the dress code...I yelled at T to "bring me water...HURRY!"
I swear to god I would PAY to read your posts!!
HUGS!...
Mona

Wsprsweetly Of Cottages said...

I hope the "voting" police don't come get me. I voted for Lacy over and over...I kept thinking it just might not go through...and I just wanted to make sure! Oh well...I'll just pay the fine. She BETTER win or I am going to yell "FIX!!"

Mrs. B. Silly said...

I've run screaming from your blog after that last picture. Sorry I couldn't stick around long enough to leave a comment. You can find me hiding under my bed or at least trying to hide under there if I can get my fat butt under!

Shawn said...

Hey girl----could you perhaps go on over to my blog and link onto MMB to vote for my blog for the best June blog?


Its a long shot, but what the heck!

Thanks tons!

Michael said...

The stupid pin is the best, but the Mensa candidate had me rolling!

LiLu said...

Wait... us dorks DON'T rule the world??

What are you saying??

BeeHappy said...

I love the superman undies! :)

The Kooky Queen--Rachel said...

That was SOOOOOOOOO funny!!! Loved the ID one!! My hubby went to get his DL renewed this week and when asking for his current address, my hubby couldn't remember. See, no one in town knows there address because we all use PO boxes. So the lady was like, "Just make it up, dear." Hey I did! My weight is about 30 pounds LESS, haha!!!

Fifi Flowers said...

WEDNESDAY is the BEST day... I know where to find a laugh... oooops... I'm visiting on Monday!

Lo said...

I actually got some of those germ stuffed animals for my BIL who just became a doctor. He thought they were a riot!

Tulsi said...

So many, so funny. The speed bumps caught me so off guard and made me laugh out loud. The incest repellent caught me off guard after hearing what I heard today.

Auds at Barking Mad said...

OK so I'm only a week late with this.

Again, my excuse is that I am delaying my gratification.

 

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